The Twin

A place with the absence of light. No hope in sight. Only dishonesty and betrayal. The confusion makes it harder to breathe. Nowhere to go to escape the stabbing pain. Suddenly there's no sense of feeling. Only empty space. I ask myself why the deepest wounds healed and yet this one gets deeper with time? But I'm still alive. What for, I do not know. My twin takes over again and I find myself back in the darkness. It gets harder to find my way back to me each time. She feels free and alive in the dark. It is her cover, a shield from the mean world. She plunges into an endless hole big enough just for her. Its almost like flying. Love gives way to hate and hate gives way to helplessness. No one in sight to smile, infact no one in sight at all. Friends become snakes and nothing makes sense. She is everything I hate and yet I cant let her go. Shes into me, taking over and is becoming me, the new me. I see a ray of light. Seems the end of the fall is near, and is closing in. The twin is scared of it but a tiny part of me wants it to come closer, wants to be touched by light once again. But what is real? Which 'me' is more free? Which 'me' is stronger? Which 'me' is easier to let go? I'm forgetting what it feels to be loved, how it feels to trust. Forgetting to feel at all. Hospital beds is all I see before I forget to breathe and let her be me. The twin finally got me.